Aside

Cold

I found out today that my favorite bakery in Kailua, Agnes Bake Shop, is closing its doors on Sunday. I’m heartbroken because I loved that place. The Portuguese sweet bread is the stuff of dreams, and the malasadas were, let’s be real, better than Leonard’s. I haven’t been since at least 2015 when I last visited Hawaiʻi and I’m too sad that I won’t be there to snatch up the last few loaves before they close.

Even worse, I found out that they have Agnes Bake Shop in Japan, but it’s awful. It looks like every crappy tacky wannabe-Waikīkī cafe. I hate it.

AUGH

AUGH

Why is a good 50% or more just a big blob of white rice? Why is there a blotch of pasta (?!) in the upper right corner? Why is the meat so tiny and covered with shredded daikon? What on earth is that salad?!?!?!

The other pictures are also disappointing (pancakes?! shitty overpriced craft beer that nobody in Hawaiʻi actually drinks?!) and have made me lose all my will to live. I don’t know if I’ll ever get over this. It was bad enough learning that Agnes was going away, worse still knowing that it’s going to live on as this trendy Tokyo abomination.

I just want a loaf of Portuguese sweet bread from Agnes. Sigh.

AGNEEEEEEEEES

AGNEEEEEEEEES

Don’t look up your heroes, kids. You’re better off not knowing.